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Pages out of my life...

17th Nov 2010

I never was, and don’t think I will be a prolific writer ever. However, not all of that is sad. That just says I enjoy a lot many more things other than writing. I’ll keep this account a personal one and obnoxiously about me.

I have, for all those times I haven’t being writing, mostly talking to myself. My kind of conversations with others happens only once in a while. It’s like achieving the simultaneous conversational orgasm. Tough to come by, ain’t it?

Today, 17th Nov, it’s raining here in Ahmedabad. It’s one of those rainy evenings I want to enjoy lying down on my bed, typing words occasionally on MS Word and sipping a cup of HOT coffee while staring at the misty window glasses, losing myself in Eddie Vedder’s grainy voice.

I should also be thankful to the cool breeze that I have no idea comes from where! Nonetheless, jolts me out of the day dreams I am weaving, quite pleasantly.

And as much I am enjoying this solitude (which I do often), suddenly all the complaints from life have vanished except that in next 10 mins this is going to come to an end. And, once again all those deadlines, rehearsals and pre-reads will raise their heads and confront me.

As much as I am fond of being with myself, there are moments when I just want a zillion people around me. The constant unfreezing of status quo using both of these one after another, pretty much sums up my life.

I am glad that I can still afford to paint a picture of the days ahead in carefree hues of travelling across the lands and waters. I don’t know if I’ll continue to do so in the coming years, but I have a sneaking suspicion I won’t. Just one of those things, too good to stay around for long.

And, the phone rings. I am hoping to write more today.

22nd Nov

Why the hell does it keep raining all the time in Ahmedabad?

The more I listen to the kind of music WE are making, I realise I am still so far away from the kind of music I can soak my soul in and lay in a semi-comatose state penetrated by that music and nothing else. I am one of those people who fall in love with the melody first, words next and maybe never. I am one of those singers who often don’t remember the lyrics of maybe, their most favourite song.

Anyway, what I find enormously fascinating about the people of Gujrat is their fondness towards shiny objects when it comes to dressing up. Glasswork, I-don’t-know-what-it-is-called-in-English-but-the-shiny-somethings-we-called-Sitare-as-kids-in-Hindi and lots of other shiny stuff show up if you are travelling in rural Gujrat especially during the festive season. There’s a fair chance that I might leave Gujrat without attaining the skill to understand or speak “kaam chalau” Gujrati. I tried talking to one of the housekeeping Gujju staff in the hostel, she told me in a haste manner that they understand Hindi and some of English too, as if I was looking down upon them. Since, then I am wished good morning medam by a burly looking, lots-of-shiny-stuff-on-her-sari wearing lady.  

17th March 2011

I wonder what is this thing that music makes me feel and nothing else does. It’s a diff kind of high, paramount bliss, a tug that comes from God knows where and makes you run after it for more. Pretty much like addiction.

My favourites have always been songs heavy on the “feel” quotient. Be it a Turn the page or Paimona (Coke Studio). Strangely, I am a melody first and lyrics much later sort of a music enthusiast. I don’t remember the lyrics of some of my favourite songs. I don’t give a rat’s furry ass (too much of two and half men) about songs in other languages, as long as the music gets to me.

Offlate I have been extremely proud of a song we made. Sad part of the story, we half composed it on the morning of the show in iim shillong and pretty much left it there. The remnant of that song buzzes in my head sometimes. Which in terms feels like having (deliberately) lost my kid sister. and, hence the guilt. :/

Tomorrow is the last day of term three lectures.  Half of MBA done, I feel old. I look at the aspirants of this year and I read them priding in using some jargons every once in a while. MBA truly teaches you nothing more than putting the jargons in the right places, and maybe even wrong places as long as you can pull it off.

A year of surviving cut throat competition, delusions about friends and foes, ecstatic joys from temporary accomplishments and well, inflow of money. New found respect and gratefulness towards family and friends. On being able to let go off everything alike, the good, the bad and the ugly, I am very pleased with myself.  

Whatever happens here, no longer affects me apart from causing a slight amusement. This must be nirvana in the bigger picture. :D

There’s only one thing that hasn’t changed – hope. I see a string of glorious mornings and benign nights, despite knowing that there’s more bloodshed to follow.

There’s music, there’s travelling, there’s reading, there’s the whole thing about doing lots of stuff and staying incredibly busy and in its pretence not doing the mundane, there’s writing which seems to be coming back to me slowly.

And, thanks to the internship stipend, hopefully there will be a DSLR in my life soon.

 I must write about my travels sometime. Hmm.


( 21 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 17th, 2011 08:27 am (UTC)
Was pleasantly surprised to find your blog on the top of my Blogroll, as you hvnt updated ur blog in ages:P I thought you had migrated to another blogspace, but good to see u back:)

Wow learnt many new things. Last i knew u were in Bhopal, nw in Amdavad. Last i knew u were doing computers / IT nw MBA. Making music, investing in a DSLR:)) great. speaking of MBA n Ahmedabad, r u studying at the hallowed IIMA now?

Agree with you when you say that music stays with you, even if you forget the lyrics. I love many songs in which the language of the lyrics is completely alien to me, but the music is what keeps me coming back to them - case in point Cheb Khaled, Rammstein, the Japanese section of the Kill Bill soundtrack among others:P

Hopefully the new DSLR will trigger more regular blog posting:)

Last but not the least - Welcome Back:))

take care
Mar. 17th, 2011 06:40 pm (UTC)
Hey TD,
Trust you to get back to me whenever I get back to the blog! :) How are you?
Hahaha....you sure have traced my life accurately until now. :D No, I am not doing my MBA from IIM A but from MICA (www.mica.ac.in).

Rammstein is COOL, I will try Cheb Khaled now that you've mentioned it.

Fingers crossed, I hope I buy a DSLR first and there shall be more pictures, even if not many words. ;)

Thanks for the welcome :P

TC you too.
Mar. 18th, 2011 03:51 am (UTC)
>>>>Fingers crossed, I hope I buy a DSLR first and there shall be more pictures, even if not many words. ;)

But isn't a picture worth more than a thousand words????

Btw where are you doing your internship? I have a hunch its in Bombay. :-D
Mar. 18th, 2011 08:59 pm (UTC)
Bombay it is! ;)
Mar. 18th, 2011 09:33 pm (UTC)
Cool!!!! Which company????
Mar. 18th, 2011 09:43 pm (UTC)
Sony Network (or MSM pvt ltd)
Mar. 18th, 2011 09:46 pm (UTC)
cool!!!! If I am in Bombay some day we can meet. :-)
Mar. 18th, 2011 11:53 pm (UTC)
Absolutely! :)
Mar. 19th, 2011 03:43 am (UTC)
mail me your number then. :-)
Mar. 29th, 2011 09:57 pm (UTC)
i will get a new mumbai no. and then mail you :)
Mar. 30th, 2011 03:02 am (UTC)
sure. :-)
Mar. 17th, 2011 06:29 pm (UTC)
blogging frequency of one per sem is cool. lets meet while you are still in abad ?
Mar. 17th, 2011 06:41 pm (UTC)
Hahaha....thanks for the appreciation of my posting rate. :P
Hey, lets do that !! I am going to be out of A'bad until june end - july first week though for my internship.

In the meantime, stay in touch. :)
Mar. 17th, 2011 06:57 pm (UTC)
out of abad in summer is **cool** too. :P
Mar. 18th, 2011 08:59 pm (UTC)
Tell me about it! although I was pretty pissed with the constant rains last year...:-S
Mar. 19th, 2011 03:18 am (UTC)
Abad known for its extreme weather.....if you are pissed with constant rains ... its no match for what you going to feel in summer. ( and for constant rains, nothing beats mumbai....)
Mar. 18th, 2011 03:48 am (UTC)
>>>>I wonder what is this thing that music makes me feel and nothing else does.

I totally understand the feeling. Sometimes when I am down hole it is music that brings me up.

>>>too much of Two and a half men

you can never get too much of Two and a half men. Just finished watching cruelly shortened 8th season of the series. Too bad Charlie Sheen cannot get his act together. :-(

>>>>hopefully there will be a DSLR in my life soon

Yayyy. Hopefully we can see more of your wonderful clicks. I particularly liked the shot of the sunset. Which one are you planning to buy??? Might I recommend Nikon's D3100 if you are looking for entry level cams.
Mar. 18th, 2011 09:03 pm (UTC)
I just finished season 5, I want season 6 and it's not there on LAN. :(

I am roughly planning to spend half of the stipend on the DSLR, so I don't have better options than entry level DSLR though. I was thinking of buying D90. Basically a 18-105mm lens camera. Do you have any other suggestions?
Mar. 18th, 2011 09:44 pm (UTC)
Well D90 is not an entry level cam and seriously speaking it is a bit outdated model.
Although if you are looking in that price range, then you can also think about Nikon D7000 its the latest entry from Nikon and is a much improved, or there is Canon EOS 60D.

You can get 18-105 lens for any of the above models. Some of the tamron lenses are much better than the nikkor lenses. Just compare the lenses beforehand when deciding about the lens.

Check this link:
Hope it helps. :-)

www.kenrockwell.com is one site where you get good reviews for the lenses. :-)
Mar. 18th, 2011 10:17 pm (UTC)
I considered D7000, but that's not in my affordability range. :(
I'll check out Canon EOS 60D. Is there any place get these cams at a better price (compared to the one quoted on the website of nikon or canon)?

From my research, i understand that an 18-105mm lens makes a better lens for all sorts of photographs. While canon's 28mm/35mm is way too niche.

Mar. 19th, 2011 03:42 am (UTC)
Well you are in the city of bargain. :-D

There is this JJ Mehta in Dadar that sell cameras at very reasonable price. Its a small place but the things are very genuine. He can help you in choosing camera as well. :-)
( 21 comments — Leave a comment )

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